Old letters...

Today I’ve been going through old letters in hopes to downsize my amount of “stuff” as I’m moving out of my parent’s place on Thursday and into a place I’m house-sitting for 2 months. I’ve found letters from before we moved to Winkler, from high school…a whole huge stack of notes from one friend who I’ve lost touch with. Those were good times that we had together; but do I keep those letters full of inside jokes, teenage crushes, and silly memories? What good do they do me now? I’ve also found letters from the last four years of Bible college and summer camp. Notes of affirmation, exhortation, and admonishment from people I still keep in contact with and hope to for the rest of my life. But what good does it do to keep these letters? I like to look back on them every once and a while not only for the purpose of nostalgia but to be reminded of where I’ve been and how far I’ve come. I am so blessed to have these letters and notes to remind me of the work of the Lord in my life. While some I will discard, there are others that I will keep for a while longer so I can look back and be reminded of simple truths, encouraged in big ways, and reminded more of how big God is.

Another thing I’ve come across is letters from people who played a very large role in my life for a very short amount of time. I don’t know where these people are now or how they are doing. Some I do know that they are not living for the Lord anymore. It’s hard to think that the people who once encouraged me so greatly in my walk with the Lord are now walking away from it all. There’s something wrong with this picture. Where is the accountability in these friendships? Is it my fault? Maybe. I feel convicted to be praying for these people. What good is it if I know they are not ok and I do nothing about it? How can I hold my head high and claim to be one who follows after the example of Christ if I do not bare with others the burdens they carry and lift them up in prayer to the One who can change hearts and take the broken pieces and put them back together again? I can’t. I pray that the names and faces of my friends past and present would be placed upon my heart often and that I would be given wisdom in how to pray for them.

Something else I have been reminded of through reading some of these letters is that some of these people, I have relied on so heavily. They have been the ones I sought out in hard times and when I did not know where else to turn. They have been supports and shelters in the storms. BUT, I have relied on many of these people like they are the only ones I could trust. I relied on them like there was no God. This is a lesson I have been learning for a very long time. Run to Him Keerst! Run to the Lord first! So easy to say, but often hard to do. I find in situations where I feel I have to talk with someone, I need to literally run somewhere to be alone with God where I can’t be distracted or see someone walking by to talk to. (Oh how human I am!) Lord please give me strength.

But let us not rely on people like we rely on air to keep us going; but let us rely on our Heavenly Father and our Maker to give us what we need when we need it.

Amen.